i need an iv and a liver transplant
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize