I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Randomize