Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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