She's JV to your varsity
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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