Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
