Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
