I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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