i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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