somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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