And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
