I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
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