i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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