spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
