Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Randomize
