So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
