I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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