my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
