Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
