I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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