In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize