so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
