You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
