butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
