just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
