I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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