first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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