your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
