Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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