I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize