And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
