honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
There was a lot of him and a little penis
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
