watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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