just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
