i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
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