Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize