you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize