Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
