And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
