peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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