Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
