Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
