This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Randomize
