So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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