All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
