i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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