IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
