kristin has been a bad kristin
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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