I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Randomize