Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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