At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Fuck appropriateness.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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