Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize