i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
