I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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